21 Essential Manners Your Child Should Learn Before Their Tween Years

As parents, we want to raise kind, respectful, and confident individuals. Teaching our children simple acts of courtesy early on lays a wonderful foundation for their future relationships and self-esteem. Here are 21 essential manners every child should learn before they step into their teenage years:

1. Saying the magic word, 'please', whenever asking for something.
   
2. Always saying 'thank you' when receiving a gift, a compliment, or a helping hand.
   
3. Refraining from interrupting when two adults are speaking, unless it is a true emergency.
   
4. If an interruption is absolutely necessary, using polite phrases like 'excuse me' to get their attention.
   
5. Asking for permission first whenever they feel even the slightest doubt about doing something.
   
6. Keeping negative opinions or complaints to themselves rather than constantly airing grievances to adults.
   
7. Avoiding comments on other people's physical appearance, unless it is a genuine, warm compliment.
   
8. Replying warmly when someone asks how they are, and remembering to ask 'How are you?' in return.
   
9. Remembering to thank a friend's parents for their hospitality after spending time at their home.
   
10. Always knocking on a closed door and waiting patiently for permission before entering.
    
11. When making a phone call, introducing themselves first before politely asking to speak with the person they are calling.
    
12. Showing gratitude for every gift—even a simple handwritten thank-you note can make a beautiful, lasting impression.
    
13. Never using foul language, especially when adults are present.
    
14. Refraining from calling others unkind nicknames.
    
15. Never mocking or teasing anyone for any reason, understanding that teasing is hurtful and unkind.
    
16. Learning to sit quietly during a movie or play, even if they find themselves feeling a little bored.
    
17. Saying 'Excuse me' or 'I'm sorry' immediately if they accidentally bump into someone.
    
18. Covering their mouth when coughing or sneezing, and always using a tissue rather than picking their nose.
    
19. Checking behind them when walking through a doorway and holding the door open for the next person.
    
20. Helping with a gentle smile and without grumbling when a trusted, familiar adult asks for assistance.
    
21. Practicing good table manners: using utensils correctly and chewing quietly with their mouth closed.
    

By gently introducing these habits into their daily routines, we help our children build strong, empathetic connections with the world around them. (Adapted from David Lowry / Specialist Psychologist Ayşe Başak Erk)